Do I miss my day job?

People keep asking me if I miss my day job? No, I don’t. At least, I haven’t until today.

I play the piano and run a small independent record label called Stone Angel Music. Our artists mostly record peaceful instrumentals. The music we produce has been a major part of my life.

It was last fall when my health began failing and doctors listed me for the transplant that I canceled a little over 20 gigs and stopped spending time promoting the music.

But, that’s the difficult part. I miss playing for people. And more particular, I miss sharing my life’s philosophy in a concert or fireside setting.

I think I’ve been blessed not to really think about it. I guess it’s the drama of the unknown and the fact that all I can think about is my wife and little girl. I want more time with them and I don’t want anything to get in the way.

I look forward to recovering from the challenging surgery. It will be a difficult road for many months. But, I wouldn’t trade this experience for anything. I am learning a great deal about life and it’s purpose. You come to understand a great deal about the character of your family, friends, and other associates.

I’m getting anxious. I want to do so much in this life and give back to those who’ve selflessly served and sacrificed time for my family and me.

And, yes, I have music in me. It’s building up. I can feel it. Hopefully, with faith, prayers, and the incredible medical team, I’ll get chance to let it out.

Oh yea, listen to some of our music.
www.stoneangelmusic.com

(This is what I do during the day now - but, I don't dress up for the gig. And, that's my wife.)

106 days on the list. 15 weeks. All is Well.

106 days on the list. 15 weeks. Any predictions?

Despite the minor physical anxieties of waiting for a heart, always wearing oxygen, taking a bazillion pills, giving myself shots twice a day, and carrying around a bag of medication going directly into a permanent IV in my right arm, I have the larger anxieties experienced by those who are sick for a long time and happily married. Keep in mind that I am too tired to stay busy so all you have to do all day is think and reflect. Above all, you hope your wife, the love of your life, is happy, fulfilled, and appreciated because of her sacrifice, service, and love.

My dad is a journalist and once interviewed one of my hero's Howard Hunter, a former spiritual leader of the LDS church and community giant. The man was soft spoken and humble despite his enormous list of credentials and accomplishments. In the interview my dad asked about all the years that Pres. Hunter tenderly cared for his sick wife who later died in a rest home. "How where you able to do that all those years?" my dad asked. President Hunter with some emotion and pause in his voice said, "She would of done the same thing for me."

I'm also reminded of another time that I was at Bryner Clinic in Salt Lake to see my family doctor. While waiting I observed a feeble old woman waiting for the pharmacist to complete her prescription. She was with her husband. They were both very old, petite and weak. She sat in a wheel chair and was so tired that her head kept falling backward. And I watched this husband, who stood by her side, hold her head up, even though his hands shook and they had to wait for some time. I think he held her head for 20 minutes.

I also remember while serving a mission for my LDS church I was responsible for several missionaries of which were an old couple serving in a small mining town in California. Like all of our missionaries they were responsible to knock on doors and share a message of love about Jesus Christ. The wife had really bad arthritis and knees. At many times she couldn't use her legs because of the pain. But, she didn't want to give up. Her husband drove them in the car from house to house. He would get out and knock on the door while his wife waited. If people said yes to letting them he'd go to the car, open the door, pick up his wife and carry her into the home so they could do what they loved to do most which was bring hope to people through their message.

These several experiences that I observed are always on my mind. And I hope I get the chance to show the same expression of love and service for my wife who has so kindly sacrificed, served, and loved me through this experience. It is much easier to serve than to be served.

My Health is Steady | 90 days on the List

My health has been steady the past two weeks since the heart cath. And I realized I've been on the "waiting list" since August 20th. That's somewhere around 90 days. I'm sure I've got 90 to go or more until I get a call. There's no doubt this holiday season will be very special for our family.

I found something fun on NOVA's website. Now you can perform your very own Heart Transplant in 19 steps. Of course, my operation will be extremely more complicated that this normal procedure. But, good luck! CLICK HERE
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Also, sitting at home I have had a lot of time to reflect. And I remembered a video I've shown at my concerts that comprises some old film footage of me as a child with my sisters and little brother. Very Nostalgic. The tune is called Sacred Nature II from my Faithful album. My family has always been the rock of my life. They continue to sacrifice their time and energy to help my wife and I with our daughter and countless other things. I wish everyone could have this comfort in his or her lives.


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Meeting the transplant team

My wife and I, along with my parents, met with Latoya, a coordinator with the heart and lung transplant team. We, went over all of the aspects of being listed and receiving a heart. There is a lot of work put into the process. One is required to be in somewhat good condition so the heart will not be rejected. There are about 30 on the list in Utah. And they have over 90% success rate for the first year.

Later, we had a memorable meeting with John Doty, the son of Donald Doty who performed both of my previous operations. He studied at Georgetown and then John Hopkins. He was so positive and expressed his desire to be the one to do the surgery. He said his Dad wants to be there as well. He said, “We are not going to let anything happen to you.” I know they will do an extremely professional job. He is a great man just like his Dad. (Donald Doty served as a general authority Seventy and was a surgical partner with Elder Russell M. Nelson, an apostle in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints)

On Tuesday they will present my case before the board and there will be a vote. I’ll know in a few days if we move forward. But, I'm confident it will go through. Since my first meeting with Dr. Renlund (also a area seventy) I have had various tests and a lot of blood work. These things don’t bother me.

I have received nothing but support from family and friends. People are so good to us. And I thank everyone for their faith and prayers on my behalf. Also pray for the family whose tragedy and sacrifice will create new life and another chance for me and my family.